Saturday, July 23, 2011

Life Comes Full Circle and Other Strange Occurences

I went out last night and met up with a friend that I haven't seen since high school. It was surreal. We weren't friends in school - we hung out in different circles. Life was so different then. But the last 18 years have changed us, and after re-acquainting ourselves through Facebook we learned we lived parallel lives. And meeting confirmed this connection. How beautiful it is to meet a kindred spirit.

And it made me think, what makes a person change? Time? Loss? Location? It's everything. Time allows you to grow into your true identity, and whether that's a wife with a family and a suburban agenda or an independent spirit always free and chasing a dream, that's what time has made you. Everyone takes different paths in life, and sometimes a path less taken is often defined as a misstep. The things that occur in your life - good and bad - define you. It shapes everything about you - from your demeanor to every small line on your face. It molds you and creates a strong persona. You're supposed to have a family and a stable life by the time you're in your 30s. But are you really supposed to? Or is that something ingrained in us from a time past the really should be reconsidered? My friend said last night, "I'm 36 and never thought I would not know what I want to do at this age?" Well, I've always known that writing was my calling, but I don't know if I'll ever be sure of what it is that I am supposed to be doing in this life. I honestly don't know if I'll ever know if I am doing the right thing with my life. But that's growing. That's what life is about.

And it's comforting to know that there's someone out there that understands my plight. Funny, 18 years ago I would have never thought this was where I would be in my life. But now that I'm here, I wouldn't change a thing. My life has come full circle. The awkwardness and curiosity that I had when I was 17 has returned. But I wouldn't have it any other way.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Time to get back to what's important....

It's been months since my last blog and it's time to get back to it. A lot has happened in the past five months. I've packed up, moved from north to south, settled in and become accustomed to life in Charlotte. I love my life here. Work is challenging and I tend to be tired a lot. But I've finally found the city I am meant to live in. I love it here: the culture, the convenience, the southern hospitality. It's perfect for me.
It's refreshing knowing I'm happy here. It's been a long time since I've felt like I've been home. The air here smells like the south, and every time I walk outside I can smell the pine needles, the air and the soft scent of childhood. It's like living in my hometown but not having to go back. It's a lovely contradiction.
There are so many things I love about the south that I missed. Funny thing is I never realized how much I missed it until I got back down here. It's amazing how when it rains the drops are large swollen drops that soak the very thing it lands on. People are friendly - no matter where you go someone is happy to hold a door, say hello, excuse me or thank you. The food is spectacular - slow-cooked, well-thought out and delicious.
Life is good. But something is still missing. What? I don't know. It may take me time to figure it out, but I'm willing to take time to learn more. I can't wait to see what I find.